Mary Rose Evans: cat, unicorn, and dub-step lover. And my saving grace.

Mary Rose Evans is one of the few (possibly only) people who understands me these days. And she's pretty amazing.

Life post-India has not been easy, as I have said before.
I am the Queen of Nostalgia. THE QUEEN.

India is on my mind all the time. Everything I do reminds me of India. Everything.
It's rather destructive.

And Mary is always there to console me when I have a "missing India meltdown." (Which happens frequently). She understands what I'm feeling.

When you travel to a foreign country with someone, they become your best friend.
Before India, Mary and I were more of acquaintances. We basically got to know each other on the lengthy flights to India, and obviously throughout the six week journey.

Mary and I met in January at BYU-Idaho. She lived in the apartment next door and was also one of my Family Home Evening "sisters."
Clarification for those who are confused: At BYUI you are assigned a "family" that you do things with every Monday night. We call it Family Home Evening, or FHE.

At our first FHE of the semester, which consisted of two apartments of girls, and one apartment of guys, we were doing some dumb, I mean great getting-to-know-you games (I HATE getting-to-know-you games). Anyway.

We were going around the room, saying our names, and something interesting about ourselves.

When it was Mary's turn, she said her name (Mary Rose Evans, in case you forgot), and then said that this summer she was going to India to do humanitarian work in leprosy colonies.

I NEARLY PEED MY PANTS. I MEAN DIED.

Here is how the rest of the conversation went:

Me: Wait, what program are you going with?!

Mary: Rising Star Outreach!

Me: WHAAAAATTTTTTTTT! Me too!!!! What session are you going to?

Mary: Session three.

Me: WHAAATTTTT! Me too!! Oh my goodness!

Mary: We should get the same flights so we can travel together!

Me: I would love that, but I'm traveling for three weeks with my Grandpa before Rising Star! You should come with us!

Mary: Okay...

And then I proceeded to bounce up and down in my chair because I was so excited.

You see, I am extremely expressive in my emotions. I get excited very easily, and it shows. That's where Mary and I are different, and it's one of the things I LOVE about her. She can be excited about something, but she doesn't go all crazy like I do. Someday I'll learn to control myself. Probably not. 

Now back to the story. Little Miss Mary thought I was just being polite inviting her to travel with my Grandpa and I, but that I wasn't really serious. But boy oh boy was I serious. So a few weeks went by, and she decided to travel with us. And I'm SO grateful she did.

How awkward would it have been to have my grandpa trying to get this picture of just me alone. . . .

PRETTY AWKWARD. It was awkward enough with the both of us.

And that's just one reason I'm grateful she came with us.

Together we fed holy cows, counted the number of men we saw peeing on the side of the road, tried weird food, ate some amazing food, got henna tattoos, experienced Delhi Belly, were forced to take pictures with men in their underwear, saw the Taj Mahal, got scammed into paying way too much for a cute blanket, rode an elephant, volunteered with Rising Star Outreach, chased pigeons, met some amazing people, and so much more.

We had SO much fun and she will forever be one of my best friends.

I'm not trying to be a drama queen, but Mary understands how much my heart hurts not being in India. Because sometimes it really, really hurts.
India has my my heart. The children at Rising Star Outreach have my heart. The leprosy patients have my heart. And my family that lives in India have my heart.

Last night Mary told me something her dad said that totally helped me make sense of how I feel. Because sometimes it's really confusing.

How can my heart feel so empty when I have been blessed with so much?
I have an amazing job that I absolutely love. I get to take care of the cutest little old people. It's like having 50 grandmas and grandpas. I have an amazing family. I have a place to live, with my ever generous aunt and uncle. I am so blessed.

Yet, I often find myself looking at flights to India. Planning a get away. Now, don't freak out Dad. I'm not going to hop on a plane to India and never return. It's just that life sometimes feels so. . . lifeless not being in India. My life right now isn't terrible, it just isn't the greatest thing ever, either. I have no motivation to do anything.

So, now to what Mary's oh so wise father said. . . . . .

While we were in India, especially at Rising Star Outreach, we experienced a little piece of heaven, and no matter how good life can be, it's not heaven, so it doesn't seem as good.


AMEN, AMEN, AMEN.

It all totally makes sense.

So now what do I do? I've realized that my nostalgia has become semi-destructive. I'm a thinker. And the thinking creates sleepless tearful nights. And me + little to no sleep = Miss Grumpy Gills.
Which nobody likes.

I have to find a way to create a little piece of heaven sans India. I can't be in India all the time. So I have to make heaven right here, right now.

I just have to figure out how to do that. I need to find ways to keep myself busy. Well, busier.
I love lists. So I'm going to start a small list here, because then I feel semi-accountable.

1. Find more ways to serve.

2. Read and study my scriptures daily.

3. Say my prayers, morning and night.

4. Be better at keeping in touch with people.

5. Write my friends/family that are serving missions.

6. Write letters to the children at Rising Star. Now this could potentially backfire, thus creating more nostalgia, but I would feel guilty if I didn't keep in touch with the children there.

7. Go to bed early (well as early as I can, since I work until 10:30), and wake up early.

8. Run, run, run.

Life will get better. It will.


And now, time for a video.

This is one of my favorites.

"Don't you quit. You keep walking. You keep trying. There is help and happiness ahead."

"Some blessings come soon, some come late, and some don't come until heaven. But for those who embrace the Gospel of Jesus Christ, THEY COME."

"IT WILL BE ALRIGHT IN THE END. Trust God. And believe in good things to come."



There are good things to come, sometimes it just takes a little patience, and a little (or a lot) of faith.

Thank you, Mary for going to India with me. Thank you, Mary for consoling me in my "missing India meltdowns. Thank you, Mary for being one of my best friends. Thank you, Mary's dad for being a genius.

Love you, Mary. 

Also, this pictures is hilarious. 

And now I will start creating my own little piece of heaven here in South Jordan, Utah. Or try to, at least.

Ready, set, go.
OKAY.